How to be a Super Sensitive Badass in Bed
Do you find yourself more aware of sounds, smells, touch, taste, subtleties, and nuance? Can you tune into someone's energy from across the room? Do you need sex to be slower with a longer build-up and intentional aftercare?
You may be an empath or a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP). Empaths and Highly Sensitive People are wired to be more aware of external stimuli and emotions. This can make sex feel like a game of red light green light, where filtering all the input of information, and managing your own experience can become overwhelming when all you yearn for is to relax, enjoy the moment, and get turned on.
As a Super Sensitive Badass™ myself, I’ve found it daunting to navigate intimacy and sex while having a highly sensitive nervous system. Knowing that great sex is not only possible, but can be amplified for an Empath an HSP, I looked through the research, my work with clients, and my personal experience to understand the crucial ingredients to deepen intimacy, build passion, and harness that sensitivity as a super sexy gift.
Admit You’re Sensitive to Yourself and Your Partners
Even discovering what it means to be Highly Sensitive or Empathic can be a right of passage, validating that your experience is real and you’re not alone. All the times you’ve ever felt the need to dim the lights, change the song on the playlist, or change the temperature of the room become a validated necessity.
As with most situations, naming what is occurring helps to alleviate any tension or fear associated with it. The more you own your sensitivity and love yourself for it, the more you can care for yourself with that knowledge.
Protecting Your Personal Bubble
Being bombarded by other people's emotions, thoughts and energy can be draining and stressful. Giving yourself permission to take time for yourself to be alone, rest, and relax is essential in being able to connect to pleasure. Ask your partner to give you space before intimacy, and invite them to slowly enter into that space with their words, soft-touch, or caring energy. This build-up of connection can not only prevent overstimulation and overwhelm, it can also build up the sexual energy and desire between you and your partner(s).
The Pleasure is in the Detail
Since highly sensitive people are so aware of subtleties, their pleasure can be enhanced by paying attention to those subtleties. Luxuriating in long, intentional touches; settling into energy exchanges; leaning into whispers of sweetness can be all that an HSP needs to make their body ripple, twitch, and ache for more.
I Think Therefore I Am
Where your mind goes, your energy will follow. Thinking about the dirty laundry, the grocery list, or the unopened mail will lessen connection, intimacy, and ultimately your pleasure. If you are an HSP or are engaging with a person who is Empathic or Sensitive, be sure to stay present and keep your mind focused on the sexy thoughts and energy that will keep you and your partner(s) longing for more.
When you are able to harness your superpower for connection and sensuality, it can be a deeply powerful, energetic, and orgasmic experience for all involved.
Artwork by @nawaal_illustrations
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